|FACT: The apocalypse has come. All are dead. You never should’ve asked her out.
The Last Man on Earth
Shit, rejected again. You are The Last Man on Earth. Sorry, but most women would rather see the human species wither to an end–and therefore deny the most fundamental instinct that living creatures have–than sleep with you.
Random Brutal Sex Dreamer (RBSDm)
We’ve learned the following: you don’t think things through. You’re haphazard. You’re dangerous. You’re somewhat inexperienced. It’s totally obvious that you’re a horny bugger, as well. Everybody knows that and steers clear.
To top things off, when you do find your way into a relationship, you tend to be a dick somewhere down the line and fuck it all up.
There’s a small, but negligible, chance we’re wrong. In any case, your friends find your shit hilarious. There’s nothing cooler than a dude reducing himself to human rubble.
|Your exact opposite:
Deliberate Gentle Love Master
ALWAYS AVOID: The Sonnet
CONSIDER: Half-Cocked, The Nymph